I Can’t Help Falling in Love…

Year One, Month 6, Day 22

Yeah, I know.

I know what I wrote in my last post about NOT being in love in Alex…yet.

After last night’s date with him, I realized it was too late.

I’m in love.

I’m scared, hopeful, forgetful.

I can’t keep my thoughts off him for very long…and I’m not just remembering the sex.

I think about his smile…how his eyes light up as soon as he sees me…how my hand feels in his…how safe I feel when I am with him.

I wonder how his day is going…I send him a funny text or video clip during his lunch break because I want to make him laugh during the day.

I want to fall asleep in his arms each night.  I want to see his face as soon as I awaken in the morning.  I want to enjoy a cup of coffee with him as we both prepare for the day.

I want to cuddle with him on the couch while watching a movie and eating popcorn. Even sitting in silence and reading books sounds like a perfect way to spend an evening.

Is it too fast? Am I being foolish? Does he feel the same way?

Now, I don’t know what to do. Stay quiet about my feelings …or  tell him.

It’s devastating l to say “I love you” and not get an “I love you” back.

All I know is when I look in his eyes, I see myself reflected back.

Is that love?

I wish I knew.

Take my hand
Take my whole life too
Cause I can’t help falling in love with you…


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