Life’s Been Good, Part Deux


Year One, Month Eleven, Day 15

Yes, Gentle Readers, Lizzie is back.  And I can’t believe it’s been nearly three months since my last post.

But, I have been busy.

Let me get you caught up on what has been happening in my life recently.

First, in my previous post, I was all nervous about meeting the rest of Alex’s family at his eldest daughter’s wedding.

All I can say is I was foolish to be worried.

The wedding went well. His sister, brother-in-law, grandson, and eldest daughter all liked me.  Granted, we aren’t close yet, and I’m being very careful about any interactions with them; I’m letting him set the pace and I don’t insist upon going with him when he has a “date” with one of his daughters.  I think it’s important for him to have time just with them; I’m sure when the time is right, and IF things get even more serious between us, I will start spending more time with his kids.

Second, Alex has met most of my family as well, and they liked him, and he liked them (with the exception of the evil in-law…and he could see why this person and i don’t get along).  He has only to meet my sister…and I”m quite sure that will go well,

Third, I finally got a job.  I’m working as an independent contractor for a multinational business consulting and management firm that has a new center in my area.

A “business factory” in other words.

I can’t say exactly WHAT I do, but I can say i am doing research and development for a “large” social media network.

Yes, THAT social media network.

I’m about to start my second month, and I am hoping that my contract will get picked up at the end of my third month and that I”ll be a full time employee of the business factory.  But, at the same time, I am keeping my eyes and ears open for a full time job with benefits.  You never know when the right job will pop up.

So, I guess you can say I’m very close to having my life back on track  It’s not perfect by any means, but I do have a boyfriend I love with all my heart, a job I enjoy, and friends who make my life full and interesting.

I know I have only given you the highlights, but I promise I’ll give you more details on things with Alex in later posts.

Lizzie has found her lobster.

Stuck on You


Year One, Month 7, Day 25

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Cupid is a sneaky little bastard.

Alex used the “L” word. (And I don’t mean “lesbian.”)

In an earlier post, I had admitted that I was falling in love with him, but  I was completely unsure about how he felt about me. He’s been through so much the last ten years, that I didn’t really think he WANTED to fall in love again.

And I wasn’t sure I was ready for it myself.

Well, let me explain how it happened.

We had gotten together for our usual Friday night date.  This time it was dinner and we stopped by one of my dearest friend’s home for her 50th birthday party.  (Yes, I’m slowly introducing Allen to my friends and family.)  He was a hit with Annette and her hubby.

We got back to my place, and well, you know.  We are still in the stage where we can’t keep our hands off each other.  🙂

When we woke up the next morning, we enjoyed each other,coffee, breakfast, and each other (again).

But this time somethingfelt very different. I could feel the emotional connection and his vulnerability.  His gentleness and his passion.

At one point, he raises up on his forearms, looks me square in the eye and says “I love you, Lizzie.”

My heart stopped and I could feel tears in my eyes.  I thought to myself…”Does he love me or does he love fucking me? ”  I knew I was going to have to gently find out what he meant, since men will say the darndest things during sex.

I, of course, replied, “I love you, Alex.”  It is honestly how I feel, and I thought may as well let the cat out of the bag.

He saw the tears in my eyes, kissed them away, and said, “I hope those are happy tears, Sweetie. I’m going to do everything in my power to make you happy…and I’m never letting you go.”

Afterwards, he grinned at me and said “Oops…we’ve gone and done it now.”  I asked him if he really meant it when he said he loved me….or was is just the sex?

Alex smiled at me and said, “I love you AND making love to you.  They are one and the same. I knew pretty early on I was falling for you…and I could see how you felt about me when I looked in your eyes.  Yours really are ‘windows to the soul,” Lizzie.  It just felt right at that moment to tell you how I felt.”

I told him that I had meant what I said…that I loved him too and he was stuck with me.

“But,” I continued, “I know this complicates things for you, and that you probably weren’t looking or expecting to fall in love. Let’s just see how everything goes and not rush things.  I’m not going anywhere anytime soon, Alex.  All I want is to make you happy for the rest of my life.”

“You already do that, Sweetie,”  he said.

I’ve found one of my ones.

Stuck on you
I’ve got this feeling down
Deep in my soul
That I just can’t lose
Guess, I’m on my way
Needed a friend
And the way I feel now I guess
I’ll be with you till the end
Guess I’m on my way
Mighty glad you stayed

I Can’t Help Falling in Love…


Year One, Month 6, Day 22

Yeah, I know.

I know what I wrote in my last post about NOT being in love in Alex…yet.

After last night’s date with him, I realized it was too late.

I’m in love.

I’m scared, hopeful, forgetful.

I can’t keep my thoughts off him for very long…and I’m not just remembering the sex.

I think about his smile…how his eyes light up as soon as he sees me…how my hand feels in his…how safe I feel when I am with him.

I wonder how his day is going…I send him a funny text or video clip during his lunch break because I want to make him laugh during the day.

I want to fall asleep in his arms each night.  I want to see his face as soon as I awaken in the morning.  I want to enjoy a cup of coffee with him as we both prepare for the day.

I want to cuddle with him on the couch while watching a movie and eating popcorn. Even sitting in silence and reading books sounds like a perfect way to spend an evening.

Is it too fast? Am I being foolish? Does he feel the same way?

Now, I don’t know what to do. Stay quiet about my feelings …or  tell him.

It’s devastating l to say “I love you” and not get an “I love you” back.

All I know is when I look in his eyes, I see myself reflected back.

Is that love?

I wish I knew.

Take my hand
Take my whole life too
Cause I can’t help falling in love with you…