Don’t Stop Believin’


Year 1, Month 3, Day 5

Sorry for the cliché Journey song…but it is perfect for this post. LB

Turning fifty is a milestone; one I will celebrate A LOT in the coming months since most of my friends are hitting the half century mark this year.

In fact, I went to my first fiftieth birthday bash last night.

Holy-Bleep-3-Ply-Lunch-Napkins-50th-Birthday1

Last night’s birthday girl has had a bad couple of years.  She discovered her husband of 32 years had been having an affair.  She has always struggled with depression and fell into alcoholism after discovering her husband’s cheating.  Her hubby, also struggling with depression, had to get his shit together to help my friend find her way back from the brink.

They aren’t out of the woods yet, but seeing them together last night did my heart good….and gave me hope.  They are fighting to save their life together.   And even though they still struggle (my friend fell off the wagon about a month ago), they are walking proof of the tired old cliché, “If at first if you don’t succeed, try again.”

And, like most clichés, there is an element of truth in it….especially in your love life.

Think about it like this, Gentle Reader.

If you had given up on learning how walk after the first few times you fell on your ass you would still be crawling on your hands and knees. Or, if you had stopped learning how to use a knife and fork at meals, you would be eating like an animal on business lunches and dates.

But you didn’t give up… because it is human instinct to keep going.

As you learn, you always stumble and fall…until you find your feet and you take a few steps forward.

The same thing applies to our romantic relationships.

You will kiss a few frogs…you will be heartbroken a few times…you will want to crawl into a hole and vow to never get involved with anyone else.

But if you don’t allow yourself to be vulnerable, you’ll never enjoy the happiness at the end of it all.

Seeing my friend and her husband last night made me realize I shouldn’t hide myself away. I don’t need to settle for superficial “FWB” relationships and being second best.  I need embrace the falls and heart breaks when they happen and learn from them.

Loving myself and opening my heart are the first faltering steps into my next fifty years.

And I’m going to make fifty look fabulous.